5/2/24
I’ll cut to the chase –
I signed up to run a marathon.
Yes, I’m terrified.
Yes, I did it voluntarily.
No, I’m not suffering from a 28-year-old identity crisis.
I am,
however,
sick and tired of being afraid.
Maybe you’re thinking,
“Leah, you should be afraid of 26.2 miles,”
and most people would probably agree with you.
In a similar vein,
I don’t particularly resonate with the idea of being a fearful person.
Maybe you do –
maybe your fear is well-known by you,
seen considered and protected by your inner self.
For those of us whose feelings tend to live with less time in the light,
the presence of fear might go undetected for…
well, maybe forever?
Right now, I’m reading The Courage to be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga.
I heard it discussed in a fitness podcast I love,
and when I realized it was based on Adlerian psychology,
I decided to check it out.
The book supports the idea that our lives are up to us –
the choices we make, the way we see ourselves, the meaning we give to past experiences are all things that exist within the realm of our control.
At a point early on in the book,
the main character explains to a young learner that the negative way he regards himself is serving to protect him from rejection –
in short, his “problem” is a choice he’s making,
and its origin is rooted in fear.
….I sat.
I thought about all the things in my life that I’ve wanted to do
and have avoided like the plague because I’m scared.
Scared to try and fail. To have my flaws on display.
Fear of failure runs deep for me,
but what if I made another choice?
What if you made another choice?
You don’t have to eliminate your fear to act.
You don’t have to go all-in on Alfred Adler to believe that things can change for you.
To see the ways that you’re holding yourself back.
To make a different choice.
There’s so much hope in this sweet life –
here’s to walking in it.
Here’s to running marathons!!!
Lightly,
Leah
Leah Kepley, M.Ed. 