9/5/21
Every morning, I wake up and eventually make my way to a mirror.
Brushing my teeth, throwing mascara on my eyelashes, I’m pondering the day, and more often than not, my first challenge is my hair.
Every curly-haired woman understands the battle for control over her hair. The temptation to put stake in the impact of each stray curl – the placement, the coil, the frizz, the volume. Much to consider, I know.
And my hands are tightly clenched even as I whisper to myself, “Lightly, child, lightly.”
I’ll spend time and money and mental energy planning and picking and spraying only to remember anew the consistent fruitlessness of my efforts.
Because then I step outside and rain is falling and nature does what I never could do, and perfectly formed ringlets sprout from my head like wildflowers in the springtime.
Because then I step outside and the sun is beaming and heat makes me do what I didn’t want to do, and I throw it all up into a bun – and life goes on.
It always does, right? The pursuit, the impact of lightness pervades.
“What will people think of me if I can’t even keep my hair under control?”
Control control control control. The lightness, the loosed grip is my healing.
Stepping away from the mirror and letting the curls fall where they may and moving on with my day.
You deserve lightness. You deserve unclenched fists and disheveled hair.
Here’s to holding things lightly,
Leah
Leah Kepley, M.Ed. 